POETRY FROM DINOSAURS ETC.

Below as a couple of my Mother's poems from her blog Dinosaurs etc. - link on my blogs list.

CHERIE.

Cherie was a nifty witch and Tony was impressed,
Her broomstick came from Hogwarts she'd pinched it she confessed.
She said "Tony it's a cheap way to get from place to place
and it's really rather thrilling when the wind is in your face."
Her name was Cherie and she rode the fastest broomstick in the West.

She said "everyone's complaining about the costly jet,
The ozone layer is vanishing and Gordons quite upset.
We have to do something about our travel costs,
If we don't you know what! the next elections lost."
Her name was Cherie and she rode the fastest broomstick in the West.

Now Cherie couldn't get Tone a magic broomstick so!
She went to a local store to get one she could tow.
But when she told Tony what she had in mind
He nearly went ballistic he thought her so unkind.
Her name was Cherie and she rode the fastest broomstick in the West.

Tony was so angry he said" I don't want to cause a rift
But I think I'll go to Two Jags he'll give me a lift.
I don't think I'm ready yet, I don't want to learn to fly,
I don't want to join Wilson at that party in the sky.
Not even for you Cherie on your fastest broomstick in the West.

Jill West.

Retirement and getting ready for the American tour.

Tony said "all my packing's finished I've got all that I need,
Socks and suits and shirts and such and something good to read.
I hope you've kept your load light Cherie for I must confess,
When we get to the airport I don't want to pay excess."

Cherie said to Tony "my broomstick I must take"
And those were the words that made poor Tony quake.
She said "It's a handy form of transport, I'm 0n it in a flash,
You have to admit that I've never had a crash"

While looking at the places they shortly soon would be
he said"I would let you take it if it was up to me.
But SALEM is our first stop and to be quite fair,
If you fly in on your broomstick there'll be a riot there.

Jill West.

GORDON BROWN'S HOLLOW PROMISE ON JOBS

Gordon Brown's hollow promises on British jobs for British workers have been exposed in the Telegraph today for the nonsense they are. The number of Britons in jobs has fallen by half a million since the labour market was opened to European workers according to figures compiled by the House of Commons Library from the Government's Labour force survey.

Click here for full story.

SPEAKER'S WIFE AND TAXI EXPENSES

I spotted this story this morning and whilst the amount of money involved isn't large, they seem be trying to justify it on the basis of a spurious amount spent per week - total nonsense!

Given that she lives in Glasgow she probably doesn't entertain every week. There is a deal of difference between 10 functions costing £1,000 in taxi trips and 40 functions costing £1,000. Also what counts as entertaining, does this include inviting MPs round for a "jolly"?

EU INTERFERENCE IN EDUCATION?

I thought that I would wander over to the EU website to see what they are planning to interfere with next. They have been asking for readers views on the level of physical activity required by children in schools. Whilst this is a most important topic is it really something we want to have the E U directing us on? Click here for more.

It is obvious to me that the grand plan is for all legislation to emanate from this democratically deficient institution in the future. We need a referendum now before our Parliament becomes a total E U voting shop.

THE HITCH HIKER'S GUIDE TO THE LABOUR PARTY

New labour old Vogon!

It's just come to me who Gordon Brown reminds me of, he bears a striking resemblance to the Vogon commander. I'm just so glad I've never had to listen to his poetry, his policies are bad enough.

The Vogons are a race characterised of their love of petty rules and regulations (is this ringing any bells yet). They're not very bright and they blunder on regardless of objections (clang clang) until some higher power (the EU perhaps) tells them regulation xxx.123 subsection zzz.1289 overrides any rule they wish to enforce.

The Vogons also act as the inter galactic police force (clang clang) bringing rogue planets into line and catching rule breakers.



Who would you cast as Marvin the paranoid android, I vote for Darling.

CHRISTMAS STOCKINGS AND HEALTH AND SAFETY

As the time creeps ever closer to Christmas day many chaps will be dreaming of Christmas stockings being filled. Many ladies will be looking back over the previous twelve months and considering whether their chaps deserve Christmas stockings. Hmm.

In these safety conscious days I suggest all ladies should work through the following health and safety assessment checklist.

1. Assess condition of chap, particularly taking account of age and health (note heart failure is not unheard of when confronted with stockings after a year's break).
2. Review where stockings are to be worn. If outdoors take care to assess the affect of telling the chap of the stockings being worn (over excitement can be bad for them particularly in cold weather). If the stockings are to be worn indoors prepare the house carefully, take care to remove any items on the floor which may be a trip hazard (it is well known that chaps will rush blindly towards stockings with no thought for their personal safety).
3. Food should be kept light and alcohol minimal (to avoid ladders caused by over enthusiasm).
4. Make sure you unplug the phone and disconnect the doorbell (interruptions can be fatal).

Providing the above are followed and of course suitable insurance cover is obtained, there is no reason that stocking filling shouldn't be a safe and healthy activity at Christmas time.

DAVID CAMERON'S INCREDIBLE JOURNEY

I've just finished watching "David Cameron' s Incredible Journey " on the BBC. I have to say it's left me feeling slightly depressed and I'm not really quite sure why. Even allowing for the BBC's usual editorial slant I wish I could believe a little more whole heartedly in his ability to keep the party all pulling in the same direction.

It seems that "leadership=PR prowess" these days in the eyes of world. This is a real problem for any leader as the two main parties are such broad churches that the balancing act between party and media is often impossible to achieve. The programme certainly showed David Cameron's ups and downs in this respect, his conference speech was a genuine masterpiece and one can only admire his ability to speak without a script. There are however still major gaps in my understanding of his policy on some areas (am I missing something?).

I would like to know how he intends to deal with the EU problems that Labour have landed us with, at some point he has to stand up to the old guard in the Conservative party (unless of course he's one of them but isn't telling us) and put forward a policy for a much more robust attitude towards a federal Europe.

I should also say I am not anti Europe I am pro democracy and the current EU set up has no hint of democracy and a large whiff of hypocrisy.

CHRISTMAS DAY IN THE HOUSE

It was Christmas day in the house and no MP's were there,
A vote on the EU treaty they didn't have a prayer,
So they went home to tuck into turkey with trimmings oh so festive,
Those wanting a referendum were getting oh so restive,
Democracy has gone for good if this new treaty's in,
Rip it up, throw it out, just chuck it in the bin.

Now Gordan raises up his hand, "pipe down you noisy rabble",
I can't believe he really thinks that this will cut the babble
Of voices up and down the land all linked by common cause
To force a vote on a referendum that will give a pause,
Cut back the tide of regulation that's ever flooding in,
My wish for all this Christmas time is to halt this dreadful sin.

NO SCRUTINY, NO WONDER AND GLOBAL WARMING TOO!

Like many people I have been suffering from too much global warming today, I'm afraid the office heating system wasn't coping with the outside temperatures too well. This may have made me a little more cranky than usual so look away now if you're feeling delicate.

I found these posts on John Redwoods diary today, they confirmed what I have suspected for some time - the argument for not allowing us a referendum does not hold water. The idea being that if we elect the great and good to represent our views they should be allowed to get on with it.

Unfortunately from what John says it is obvious that most of us and our views are not really represented most of the time, and the real scrutiny is done (if at all) by outside lobby groups who have read the proposed legislation. Even that really doesn't help as Johns points out that a lot of the real regulation is added in the form of statutory instruments AFTER the bill has been passed.

It's no wonder we end up with over complicated, unenforceable laws. It is my belief that this situation has been exacerbated by the vast amount of regulation coming from the EU that has to be implemented in the UK. All our valuable Parliamentary time is taken up implementing things we have little or no control over - a situation which can only get worse in the light of the new EU treaty that Gordon Brown has signed on our behalf.

We no longer live in a true democracy and this makes me very sad indeed.

I would like a web project started to publish in full all current legislation and all proposed legislation - freely available to anyone who was mad enough (as undoubtedly some of us are) to read it. Give us some real power if our MP's can't cope with the small print let the bloggers at it!

http://www.johnredwoodsdiary.com/2007/12/17/ignorance-of-the-law-is-no-excuse/#comments

http://www.johnredwoodsdiary.com/2007/12/17/gordon-brown-wont-answer-about-why-he-signed-the-eu-treaty-without-a-vote/

It may be it's already out there, but not in one place - let me know if I'm missing out!

GORDON'S NEW LABOUR GRAND PLAN

It's taken me a while but I think I've cracked the grand plan, Gordon's going to making everything illegal unless he specifically says it's allowed. He has played around with this concept for some time, using the poor hapless tax payer as his guinea pig. The ancient sport of tax avoidance is viewed with considerable distaste by 'dear old Gordon' , he would like us to follow his badly drafted rules to the letter without using them to our best advantage. He is so sure of himself he fails to consider the longer term results of his clever wheezes.

Try these two for size - cut tax on capital gains to 10% on business assets held for more than two years - intended result -to encourage investment - unintended result - foreign nationals paying very little tax. Introduce detailed rules on party funding - intended result - cut the Conservatives down to size - unintended result - land own party deep in the mire because they are no more snow white than the rest of us mere mortals.

Will he learn? No I don't think so do you?

GERRY ROBINSON ON BBC2 - GREAT PROGRAMME

I watched with delight the change of culture at Rotherham General hospital since Gerry Robinson's last visit. The staff and chief executive really did seem to have taken on board his comments and resolved many of the problems he highlighted on his last visit. Interestingly I think the participants had learnt a lot by seeing themselves through their colleagues eyes, particularly amusing was the consultant who had had a t'shirt printed with the slogan "how ? old am I today".

However and it's a HUGE however it is obvious that they are still being held back by the Governments total failure (as usual) to be able to implement an effective computer system on time (never mind on budget). The hospital held off investing in improved systems of their own on the promise of a new NHS system in 2005. This still hasn't materialised and is now predicted not to arrive until 2010! Unbelievable yes, surprising ,sadly no.

42 DAY DETENTION AND MAGNA CARTA DISPLAY IRONY

I find it one of life's strange ironies that on a day when people are queuing up to see a display of the Magna Carta documents at the Bodlian Library the Government are pressing ahead with plans to extend to 42 days detention without charge. I have yet to hear them make any coherent case for this change. Whatever happened to preparing your case before arrest, why have they still not changed the rules on phone tap evidence? There are many questions, no sensible answers just political obfuscation. Do they really think we don't care how people are treated as long as they are arrested on suspicion of terrorism? If we lose our respect for freedom from detention without charge then the drip, drip, drip will continue until one day we turn around and find we have been arrested for being seen parked on a double yellow line and are locked up for 42 days while the police get around to investigating. A little far fetched maybe but.................

DETENTION WITHOUT CHARGE ARTICLE
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,,2225700,00.html
MAGNA CARTA ARTICLE
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/12/11/nmagna111.xml

GORDON BROWN A SERIAL NON-ATTENDER

Reading today that Gordon Brown is unlikely to attend the EU Reform treaty signing in Lisbon it occurs to me he may be becoming a serial non-attender, after leaving Angela Merkel to take Mugabe to task at the European union summit with African leaders. Perhaps spending ten years keeping his head below the parapet while Tony Blair took the flack has given him a taste for hiding in his office and pretending the problems are someone else's doing.

I suspect he is beginning to realise what the rest of us have known for some time - that he will never win a general election to get the mandate he really needs to underline his authority and he has so undermined the power of his team that he can't hide behind them when things go wrong. He must surely realise that being in control of everything also means being responsible for everything.

STORIES THAT CAUGHT MY EYE TODAY

David Abrahams put on planning fast-track
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/12/09/npols109.xml

PARKING TICKETS CHANGES AGAINST THE MOTORIST

The motorist gets it in the neck again. Changes are to put before MP's allowing "civil enforcement officers" (the new name for parking attendants) to issue tickets without the need to attach them to the windscreen. It will be sufficient for them to prove they have observed the offence take place. Futher many motorists will also lose their right to an independent appeal.

Whilst I'm sure that many people 'chance their arm' on a regular basis there are many more who are ticketed unfairly, tipping the balance further towards big brotherdom seems like the short route to a quasi police state. Even the new name makes them sound like policemen. Why not just call them the parking police?

The government and the local councils already treat the motorist as the ultimate 'cash cow' this is just one way to get more milk.

More on this story http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/12/08/nfine108.xml